Some things are so insignificant and meaningless that it’s silly how much they bother you—but they do. When we know we shouldn’t, we let things bother us. The human brain appears to be programmed to be bothered by insignificant events rather than major disasters. It’s also programmed to focus on what irritates and concerns us rather than the positive aspects of our lives. What can we do to alter this mindset?

It isn’t simple, but it is possible. Walk away from wherever you are the next time you feel upset or enraged by anything that doesn’t deserve such a strong emotion. Go somewhere where you won’t have to deal with other people.

Here are a few questions you can ask yourself:

1. What is this bothering me?

If something is bothering you, figure out why it is so important to you. If there is a reason, figuring out what it is could be the first step toward achieving emotional equilibrium.

2. What is it that you are frightened of?

Do some soul-searching to find out what is hurting you. Consider whether the thing that’s bothering you is related to any of your fears.

3. Does this matter to me?

If you find yourself obsessing over something that bothers you, ask yourself why it is so important to you. If you find that it is not important, then the best thing is simply not allow it to matter to you. Rather shift your focus on the things that really matter.

4. Is there anything you can do to help us fix this problem?

The answer is no in a lot of circumstances. The things that annoy us the most are usually the ones that we can’t change. If this is the case, you must admit and confess your impotence. After that, just let it all go.

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