Possessiveness can only be unhealthy to a relationship. People may feel possessive for a variety of reasons, including trust concerns, jealousy, or a lack of self-esteem. If you or your partner is sliding into a possessive condition, here are some suggestions to put things in perspective.
1) Let the Past be Past
Instead of digging into your partners’ past, concentrate on what you have right now. When you realize that your partner is still talking with their ex-partners, keep your cool and learn the whole truth. If it genuinely bothers you, tell your spouse how you’re feeling so you can both figure out how to deal with it and go forward.
2) Stop judging a current relationship on the basis of a past relationship
You may have been deceived or lied to in the past, but this is a new relationship. Don’t let the past detract from what you have now. Your partner is a completely different person than your ex, and he or she deserves a new beginning.
3) Have your own individuality
Another reason you’ve become possessive is that you’ve centered your life around your partner. Remember that you two are separate entities with separate lives to live. Open yourself up to the world, spend time with friends, and pursue a career, etc. Of course, it’s crucial to spend time together, but it’s also enjoyable to spend time apart and have other things to share and discuss when you do.
4) Trying to change who they are
When you’re in a relationship, pushing your partner to change to fit your ideas is never a good idea. You must recognize that you and your partner are different humans with flaws and doubts, just like everyone else. You can’t simply tell your partner that they need to improve since they don’t fulfill your expectations; this is very unhealthy in a relationship.
5) Trust
The inability to trust causes possessiveness. Therefore, learn to put your trust in your partner. It is critical that you have faith in your partner’s ability to make your relationship work, which includes ensuring that he or she will not harm you.
6) Don’t snoop
Checking an open account’s emails, browsing through sent SMS messages, looking through the browser history, etc are various ways of spying on your partner. It may appear to be innocent and unimportant, yet it is causing rifts in the relationship. You definitely believe there is something to be found, which undermines your trust in your partner.
7) Don’t be jealous
Jealousy not only destroys relationships quickly but also makes you bitter and spiteful in your everyday life. You don’t have to be envious of anyone else with whom they may be spending their time. To deal with it, consider the history you shared and the future you want to pursue together, and how all of this will be squandered if you keep the sense of possessiveness in your heart and thoughts.
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